everything. everything. so many things.

And when the earth fades
Falls from my eyes
And You stand before me

I know You love me
I know You love me.

Maybe the past two weeks have been the highlight of the holidays because I spent it with family.

Well. Spent loads of money. Loads and loads. 😛 I can’t say whether it was worth it or not because the money spent wasn’t mine. 😀

The camp was inspired. Its probably the most life-changing camp I’ve ever been to. Best part- it was life-changing in all the right areas. God was there. It was so clear.

So move over ONEcamp hahaha! 😀

SHAMMAH WAN SUI! SHAMMAH WAN SUI! Jehovah Shammah – The Lord is With Us.
Isaac, Tash
ShuiMin, Charlotte
Kelyn, Yiying
Felicia, Arielle, April
Mathew, Daniel Sim, Victor, Ben

Let’s see. The flag that represented our salvation – the one that kept us on our toes throughout the camp. Whoa anxiety attack! The camp comm always sneaking around trying to get their hands on one. Sam was paranoid she even bathed with the flag!

Contact rugby without hands and feet. We were playing against Jeremy’s group. Ehh.. the likes of Jordan and… I cannot remember who. haha.

The disgusting straw game thing, this murky connotation that we had to transport with our mouths and a straw to fill a bottle. wAHH. Guess who won the game for us? Yes! Ben did! GO BEN! ^^

Talentime:
The performances and Who’s Line is it Anyway? haha! The most memorable (for me) is Jeremy’s group’s judgement day thingy and the ATC idol thing when Amy sang (horrendously out of tune. – on intentional or natural I leave it up to you. (: ) Oh yes, and Shaun’s underwear thing. HAHA!

That was classic. haha. =P

Our group totally screwed up the Who’s line is it anyway thing, but Desmond’s group’s techno pole thing was really funny. haha.

*salutes* haha. 😀

OMEGA.
Well, no words can do justice what God did for the campers in this activity.
I am living the game.
Life is the game.
Its literally, the game of life.

No words can do justice what God did for me in this activity.

I’m rambling. haha.

LOVE ODYSSEY.

Went with elephant:D to watch Danni perform.

HAHA. pro bimbo. pro. haha.

One guy’s singing voice sounded alot like daryl’s. It was this musical held at BBTC. haha. Our church really should do a musical too! Or rather YMPACT should do one. After the Sunday school’s display this year, I think we should. But must have organiser. (: hinthint.

another thing, Amos was Joseph. XD

The thing that was a highlight for me though, was the visual graphics. They created a picture (or edited a picture) to become Merlion Polytechnic. HAHA. I think they edited Meridian, but it looked solidly real. The signboard anyway. And they also used the google screen shot and implanted search results. Like, “Chip’s house” for instance.

Chip was one of the characters. They used a time machine theme for the musical, and google the search engine was the time machine. haha. So when they searched Chip’s House, his house would actually appear like a product from amazon or something, they click, and they get ‘transported’.

I want to know how they did it. (:

And then was Christmas Eve service. After the morning service, I went to Darren’s (convenient mah haha. (: ) and I complained to Uncle Fong about my computer. He said that my computer’s thing is dying. Then it has been dying for over a year – so slow. haha. It miraculously worked again (Thank God) just as I was about to call for help today.

That’s why I’m blogging. Duh. haha.

Eragon last night.

Don’t watch if you haven’t caught the film! (: I think the dragon is really cool. The baby dragon was really CUTE. (: I wanna read the book now.

Oh and the guy’s quite cute too. (:

hurhur.

okay. i shan’t be ridiculous. (:

Last Words.

I’m off to camp in about 8 hours. Stuck in a group with 3 small group members – the irony.

I’m going to my youth camp for the year. I don’t think you went for yours. I didnt see you anywhere in the pictures. I’ve stopped writing long ago. The words have disappeared along with the hurt and the memories. But I still think. Sometimes. Don’t disappear though, I want to watch. I enjoy watching. (:

Smile. I always liked the bunny teeth. (:

And I’m never going to say anything to you again. Not for a long time.

010

1. Jealousy is a dangerous emotion. Even when you’re only fighting with your bestfriend over a coupla dogs. Haha.

2.

i) Jude Law is cute. Especially when he cries. Jack Black is so musical. It’ll be nice if I have someone who can compose something that sounds like me. It’ll probably sound piercing, nazel, a little jumpy and a torturing experience altogether.

ii) I received 3 phonecalls in the middle of the show. I felt so loved. (I know you must think I’m deprived.) Its the new handphone. haha. For the record, two were from my mum. LOL.

3. Photoshop is fun. My favourite is the healing brush tool. Its ironic that whereas its supposed to “heal“, if you don’t do it properly you end up disfiguring the object. hahaha. My mum likes to take pictures with the date at the side. I use this tool to get rid of the date. hahaha. (if its on a solid enough back ground). Oh well.

4. Okay not really. I like the selection brush tool. I used Eleanor’s photoshop yesterday and it didn’t have it so I had to lasso the thing which sort of ruined the picture because I have a very unsteady hand.

5. I spoilt my sandals. Those are the pair I took a year to get used to. Thanks to them, I have permanent scars on my feet and they used to hurt. Now that I’ve just gotten used to it, it spoils on me. -.-

6. I got a french manicure from my mum. Albeit a messy one, but it took her alot of effort to get it done. (: So i love it all the same. Raising a teenage daughter is a chore. haha.

7. Fell asleep while waiting for the nails to dry.

8. the DOHA games have caused me to learn how to appreciate diving. Its really nice to watch.

9. I cannot not wash my hair. Why? Because I cant tie it up so it doesnt get wet. So it either gets half wet, or totally wet (I then apply shampoo because if I don’t, it stinks after that). I also have dry hair, oily scalp. -_-

10. I don’t know why I’m writing in point form. Maybe because I need organisation in my life.

Wahh. I’m reading my second “VJ book” – Sophie’s World, Novel about the history of Philosophy. Socrates, Sophists, Plato, Aristotle… The likes. Philosophy is not as invigorating as literature, because its not very personal. Not to someone like me. Because most questions cited by philosophers are very human, and most of them think they are very smart by asking those stupid questions. Haha. I didnt know that the wind air water fire theory was by a philosopher ( I can’t remember his name).

Oh yes. I didn’t know that you could be banished for being an Atheist in the past. (In Athens I think. haha. The Greeks…)

Issues;

Maybe I’ll never be good enough you know?

Maybe I’m meant to look like the stupidhead that screws up and frustrates everyone. Maybe its my pride. Maybe the reason I was the way I was, was because I took it too personal.

She misses you too.

Its my sister’s birthday today. They went iceskating at the Fuji Ice Palace which was so crowded. I’m starting to detest crowded places. I don’t know why. Makes me feel self-conscious.

I did see Shuiming though. hahahaha. (and you know who.(: ) hehehe.

Jurong Entertainment Centre is a boring place. But its opposite a HUGE library. The Jurong Regional Library. Whoa. Its BIG and.. well, empty. I was looking for my Left Behind book. The Remnant. I’ve been waiting for that book for what.. 2 months?! -.-

But I did find some books I wanted. Richard Feynman! The one who won the Nobel Prize for Physics. I heard that he’s terrific. I shall try. Even if its about science. Six Easy Pieces. I’m supposed to be reading the VJ books. Hahah. (:

Once I’m done with this (and if I like it) I’ll probably reward myself with that book of his personal letters compiled by his daughter. Perfectly Reasonable Deviations from the Beaten Track, letters by Richard P. Feynman. Hmm. (:

Busy busy busy. Its funny – after you waste November away, the urgency suddenly takes you by the shoulders and the value of the last two weeks of December suddenly becomes so clear. And then, Rachel sits at the computer and wastes time.

Well done.

My Wish.

My Wish
Rascal Flatts

I hope that the days come easy and the moments pass slow,
And each road leads you where you want to go,
And if you’re faced with a choice, and you have to choose,
I hope you choose the one that means the most to you.
And if one door opens to another door closed,
I hope you keep on walkin’ till you find the window,
If it’s cold outside, show the world the warmth of your smile,

But more than anything, more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you’re out there getting where you’re getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

I hope you never look back, but ya never forget,
All the ones who love you, in the place you left,
I hope you always forgive, and you never regret,
And you help somebody every chance you get,
Oh, you find God’s grace, in every mistake,
And you always give more than you take.

But more than anything, yeah, and more than anything,
My wish, for you, is that this life becomes all that you want it to,
Your dreams stay big, and your worries stay small,
You never need to carry more than you can hold,
And while you’re out there getting where you’re getting to,
I hope you know somebody loves you, and wants the same things too,
Yeah, this, is my wish.

To: Shirin, Jon(who is in UK)
YuenKheng, Jaz, Dan, Kristi(who is coming with me)
Suzy, Aletheia
Danitza, SarahK, Sasha
Lynnie, Joey, Bala
Nat, Sarah, Aisha, Parveen, Dilys, My Linh, Su Chin, Nandini

I hope you know somebody loves you. (:

Meddlers.

I have an ugly haircut.

I got a line btw. Email me at you.carry.me[at]gmail.com for my number.

So you can actually call me at my handphone. Fry my brains. Heck. I don’t give a shit.

One Last Shot

Its my last shot with sc tomorrow. it feels as if everything, training, debriefs, even the competitions have come that we may face RI tomorrow.

Perhaps for them, its just another debate, their big goal is the singapore secondary school debates next year. But for me, tomorrow is supposed to be the competition that really matters. Maybe for the sole reason that it is my last.

But this indifference that I am feeling is causing much frustration. Indifference toward the finals, I’m worried about the impromtu tomorrow even though I’m in a position that I’m confident of.

The problems, headache and heartache end tomorrow, but so does the joy of teamwork – rushing cases, rushing research, flustered speeches, ruined rebuttals, spontaneous brilliance, mean comebacks, punishing the other side and laughing about it later. The wins, the losses. Those end tomorrow too. Tomorrow may be my last win – or last loss with scgs.

I’m going to make the most of it.

Run from me, not yourself.

“Welcome to the fallout
Welcome to resistance
The tension is here
The tension is here
Between who you are and who you could be
Between how it is and how it should be

I dare you to move
I dare you to move
I dare you to lift yourself up off the floor
I dare you to move
I dare you to move
Like today never happened
Today never happened

Maybe redemption has stories to tell
Maybe forgiveness is right where you fell
Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go?
Where you gonna go?”

From I Dare you to Move
Switchfoot

Is true love just once in a lifetime?

I think the term ‘true love’ is severely overused.

Just like the adjective ‘friend’ is taken too lightly these days.

I always look upon ‘friend’ as an adjective because its one of the more valuable words you use to describe someone who means alot to you. She is my friend. Friend to describe ‘she’.

I was counting the number of friends I have in sc, the debate circle, maybe tuition, I realised I have so few. I’m a lonely soul man! Haha.

I’m kidding.

About the lonely part.

(if I had a nice picture of my small, small group, i would put it here.)

Firstly, I don’t think it would be fair if I were to specially try to identify those I would consider as ‘friends’, in church, because when you think that you’re going to be with some of them ‘forever‘ (literally), you think that even if you’re not friends now, you’d be. Sooner or later anyway. (: Heck, you have forever! Furthermore, and I cannot emphasise this enough, church – church is family. You may not like all, but you love all. I like it that its that way for me. Makes things a whole lot easier every Sunday.

I wouldnt attempt to help others define what ‘friend’ is. It would be quite laughable if I really thought so highly of myself. I’d like to believe that a friend is an experience totally new that is exclusive. Its really romantic too, and its not like that boy-girl kind of nonsense.

But in general, for me, their presence brings immediate comfort, and confidence(pun intended). There is no pretence, the air is filled with shared secrets, and there is no fear to laugh, or cry, or to just stay silent. There is understanding, and love, spoken or unspoken that is true.

Extreme it may sound, but then your vocabulary probably lacks the word acquaintance or stranger in it. If it did, you probably don’t understand it.

Then there is best friend. 2 big adjectives. Very flattering indeed. If you have 2 or three best friends, then you don’t know the meaning if ‘best’ either. Which means your understanding and comprehension of the english language is in want of improvement.

I sound like a picky old person. An arrogant picky old person. Haha. I sound like… nevermind. No offence intended. You are welcome to laugh. To doubt. To shake your head! But you are not welcome to mock, or ridicule.

(if i had a picture of my bestfriend and i now, i would insert it here.)

i’ve said it once, and i’ll say it again. WE NEED TO TAKE PICTURES.

“A true friend is one soul in two bodies”
Aristotle.

Stupid questions.

I was surfing around NJip just now, and I found that they have blogs up for their 07 ip classes. I was thinking: cool. hahaha.

but that’s basically not the point.

The point is, I’m sick. I hope I’ve sweated the fever off, and that the paracetemol (however you spell it) was effective. I can’t be bothered to take my temperature again. But the headache’s down.

Maybe the reason why my posts are largely incomprehensible, its because they’re really selfish. Its all about me. Me me me me me me.

I’ve been listening to Russell Peters alot. Hilarious, vulgar, horny. And that familiar laugh. Whoa. Sickening I tell you. But I still do listen. There’s nothing left to watch anymore and that’s a relief.

MORE ABOUT ME. the EGO – MANIAC.

You Are A Realistic Romantic

It’s easy for you to get swept away by romance… But you’ve done a pretty good job keeping perspective. You’re still taken in by love poems and sunsets You just don’t fall for every dreamy pick up line!

Are You Romantic or Realistic?

You Are 45% Selfish

You are quite balanced. You are able to compromise when it’s in the best interests of those involved. But you’re no pushover. If something is important to you, you’ll get it!

How Selfish Are You?

You Are 38% Open

You are open at times, but generally you don’t let many people into your inner world. It’s possible that you have a friend or two that knows you well. But to most people, you are a total mystery.

How Open Are You?

Your Depression Level: 52%

You seem to have mild depression. A lot of people fall into your range, and it’s quite possible you don’t need treatment. If you’ve been feeling this way for a while, you may want to seek help.

Are You Depressed?

You Are 41% Angry

Generally, you are not an angry person. But you’re easily frustrated and enraged. You have one heck of a temper. And because of your anger, you tend to feel resentful and even spiteful. You already know how to quell your anger. You just need to do it more often.

How Angry Are You?

Your Love Style is Agape

You are a caring, kind, and selfless partner. Unsurprisingly, your love style is the most rare. You are willing to sacrfice your world for your sweetie. Except it doesn’t really feel like sacrifice to you. For you, nothing feels better than giving to the one you love.

What’s Your Love Style?

Go ahead and ridicule. haha. (: